Zachtionary Archive

I promised myself back when Zach first started talking that i would write down all the cute little things he said. I was terrible at it! I thought i would just remember them, but the memories slip away so quickly.

As he acquires a bigger vocabulary, experiences new things in his ever expanding world, and occasionally overhears things he shouldn't, or he accidentally botches something he is repeating, he gets funnier and funnier. Now that I am writing them down, the list of "did you hear what he just said?!" is growing quickly. So, this section is devoted to the things he shocks me with, humors me with, inquires about the world, repeats at times both appropriate and inappropriate, and the things I hope to bottle up in this little time capsule for my own pleasure. Some other longer stories that might not fit here, are labeled at the bottom of the posts as "zachtionary".

Enjoy!
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fall '08~ "I. am. a ro-bot. I. am. a ro-bot. I am...neerrrr....plug me in...."

october '08~ "Mommy? You are my sweetheart."

october '08~ "Do you think I look adorable?" (usually when trying on winter hats)

october '08~ "I am FURUS!" (furious-but he can't seem t0 say it quite right)

fall '08~ "carnivole" -meat eating animal

fall'08~ "herbivole"-plant eating animal

july '08-now~ "lil buddy"-Reece

november '08~ "I'm not tired. I was just yawning."

nov/dec '08~ "Jingle Bells. Jingle Bells. All the way. HEY! Oh what fun it is to ride in ho ho ho ho sleigh. " ...New rendition: replace "All the way" with "All the rain, rain, rain"

nov '08~ "twinkle" - Cream filled pastry aka Twinkie

nov 30, 2008~ "COOL! Look! I have a hill on my finger!" -- blood blister from his grocery cart incident.

dec '08~ "Can I have one of those crabs?" (croissants)

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Update: 12/31/08

dec 26, 2008~ "This is how I rock!" (while playing airguitar)

spring 2008-now~ "I give YOU two tickets to the gun show! BOOM! BOOM!"

dec 26, 2008~ His new Leapster game system asks the kids to "have their parents insert an SD card for more activities": "Mommy, will you get an SD card for my game?" "Why?" "Cause then there will be more titties."

nov/dec '08~ "you're kidding!?"

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Update: 1/4/09:

jan 2,2009~
Z: "Mommy? Sometimes I am in town. I work there, but live out of town."
me: "Oh, really? What do you do for a job?"
Z: "Cars."
me: "cars?"
Z: "I sell them. 200 a day. You can get one."
me: "How much are they?"
Z: "Fifty dollars"
me: "Wow, that's not much. are they any good?"
Z: "Wwwwellllll.....they ARE kinda wobbly"

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Update: 1/14/09:

"Let's make a deal...." (always followed by a one-sided negotiation that benefits him, but not me) "Let's make a deal: I play with my cars for 10 minutes and you watch"

Z: "Can I please do it for special?" me: "What's special about today?" Z: "Please. Please? For special." me: "you'll have to do better than that" Z: "I was really good today so I get it for special."

"I need a tv in my room so I can watch football any time of day. ...OK??"

"Does cars have tongues and eyes really?" (after watching the movie Cars)

"Daddy said I could do _(insert: random activity that he wouldn't normally get to do)_" (usually this is not true)

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Update: 1/30/09:

"DV Player" : DVD Player

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Update: 2/6/09:

" Mommy, you're pitiful."
"Hmm. That's interesting."

We have been discussing where our food comes from recently. Specifically, meats. We covered growth of plants from seed to food some time ago. So, Zach knows the answer to the following question, but the conversation was humorous to me nonetheless.

TV: Commercial with cows on a farm
Zach: "Mommy, do we eat cows?"
Me: "Yes."
Zach: "No, do we eat real cows?"
Me: "Yes. They give us milk, and some cows are used for meat like hamburgers."
Zach: "Eww. I wouldn't eat a farm milk cow. Gross"

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Update: 2/9/09:

"I have too many hands" - carrying lots of things; translates loosely to: "my hands are too full"
"there's fire in the potty!"

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Update: 2/12/09:

This one is old, but Laura's comment reminded me of a favorite that we laugh about a lot.-

Easter 2008, we were at brunch at the country club. The chef, a tall black man, came out to make sure everyone's meal was great. Before he approached our table, Zach sat up high in his chair and pointed at him. He then LOUDLY (in a quiet dining room full of people) and so excitedly, pronounced:
"MOMMY! LOOK MOMMY!!! IT'S TIGER WOOOOODS!!!!"
Zach always thinks he will see famous golfers when he is near a golf course, so we should have anticipated this one. Despite my efforts to silence him, it was repeated at least twice.

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Update: 2/20/09:
"Mommy? When I put my finger in my ear....it taste-es gross."

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Update: 3/4/09:
Zach was watching a tree service clearing limbs from the roadside this morning. I guess the overwhelming volume of work they have ahead of them has made an impression on him too!
Z: "Mommy, could I do that when I grow up?"
Me: "Sure, you could do that job if you wanted."
Z: "NO! I wouldn't want to do that! It would take forever and ever days and I would get thirsty!"

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Update: 3/24/09:
Watching a show about dragons (CGI that looked like the real thing and was set up like a nature show) "I bet they are glad they are not stinky anymore" (he meant EXTINCT--and thought they were dinosaurs)

Trent brought us a hot breakfast from McDonalds the other day: "Daddy, thanks SOOO much for breakfast! You are a good man."

"Elegator"-elevator

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Update: 4/15/09:
Z: Mommy, Miss Diane says that Jesus is inside us.
me: (not sure how to further this conversation) Really?
z: Yes, she says he is in our tummies.
Me: Well, I think Jesus is in our hearts
Z: No, God is in our hearts. Jesus is in Heaven.

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Update: 5/2/09:

"russ-haffle" = rough housing/wrestling
"ridicleeous"=ridiculous
"amblyence"=ambulence

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Summer 2009

"No I amn't" (no I am not)
"Mommy, I love you all the way to the moon."
"Mommy, I love you so much. I love you....in my heart"

Every night, after I tuck him in and close his door, he shouts out to me:
"Good night mommy. See you in the morning. I love you."

"Blueberries have LOTS of anee-oc-dens and are very tricious."

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March 2010
Describing a picture he drew for me: "Now, THIS is a road, but its not just any typical kind of road Mommy"

Zach: I don't want to fall and bump my head and see stars again
Me: You have hit your head hard enough to see stars before?
Zach: Uh, yah. But I can't tell you about it. Its such a long story.

Zach's current favorite game: Slug Bug... "red one." whack. "blue one" whack. "oh, oh, shiny one" whack.

Reece is finally using itty bitty sentences and Ive lost track of how many words he uses. He pretty much attempts to say anything you suggest he try and makes simple combos on his own. Some of my recent favorites:
"danks mamma" (thanks mommy)
"I unna do it" "I unna chry"(want to try)
"kincee, ewah, COME" (quincy elvis come)
"Unna spoo"/"unna poke" (want a spoon/fork--b.c i always say "poke" when we try to use one)
"I unna ju ju" (want a juice)
"See ya!"
"I ent poopoo" (guess)
"Cheese" (when a camera is pointed at him he volunteers this)

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October 2010

Location: Outback Steakhouse, dinner crowd

Reece: Momma, i gotta pooo poo

Me: No, we're leaving. You can go at home.

Reece: Ahhhh! I gotta poo poo wanna go potty!

Zach (VERY LOUDLY): Oh, come on Reece, just crap in your pants!

Entire restaurant explodes in laughter.